The Dream Zone

Dear Lauri,

I am a hairstylist and I had a dream that I stepped away from my client and someone cut off all her hair while I wasn’t looking! The girl was about 12 years old; I was so sad and so angry. She had little hair left and I transformed it the best I could and comforted her. – Tionna 20, Noblesville, IN

Lauri: Hair in dreams represents what is on your mind or your thoughts, ideas and plans because - like hair - your thoughts, ideas and plans sprout from the head. That being said, have any plans suddenly changed? Or has something happened that has forced you to change your mind about something or someone? Has something in your life been cut short? Is there a certain train of thought you need to cut short? Just as you are trying to transform her hair the best you could, in what way are you trying to make the best of an unexpected change in your life? The sadness and anger you feel in the dream is directly connected to a waking life issue that is making you feel the same way.

Tionna replies: It could possibly be the fact that my boyfriend left for rehabilitation last week. I know it's for the best but I am sad and miss him and maybe a little angry that he let his problem get to a point where it was necessary for him to have to leave me to do this. Thank you so much.

Lauri: Ah. It makes sense. It seems your dreaming mind wants you to change your thinking about this... that it wasn't something done TO you but rather something that needed to be done FOR him. And the young girl is the younger, naive part of you that is taking this so hard, which is why you were trying to comfort her. Hang in there!


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Dear Lauri,

In my dream, my kids and I are on the top floor in an apartment building. The man living across the hall wants to kill us all. I try to lock the door but there's no lock so I put a chair under the knob but another door appears for the killer to come in. I can't protect my kids. What does this mean?  – Loranda 35, Willis, TX

Lauri: The building represents something in your life that you have "built," like your career, your family, a relationship, etc. The man across the hall is something negative that you feel is nearby or looming. He wants to kill you because you must be feeling pressure in some way to forcibly change or end something. Death in a dream is about something ending or changing naturally whereas murder is more about something being forced to change or end. Trying to lock the door is connected to you trying to keep this issue out of your life but since there is no lock, this is something you cannot avoid. Putting the chair under the knob while another door appears seems to indicate that you may have thought you had taken care of this issue but something made you realize that this is here to stay. It seems to me that your dream is telling you, it's time. This needs to be handled.

Loranda replies: The building is the family I have built with my husband and our kids from previous marriages. However, my son will not accept his step-dad at all. I keep trying to help him see things differently but he is set in his ideas. I did think for a while that he was doing better then he started feeling unhappy again. We have agreed to let him live with his grandmother for the summer in hopes that he will realize his life is not too bad with all of us. I don't want him to leave, but I don't know what else to do. This dream really disturbed me and now I feel a little more at peace with it.


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Dear Lauri,

I had gone to another planet and come back covered in bugs, especially flesh colored biting spiders.  The spiders had made a nest in the back of my head and were reproducing quickly.  3 of my friends were helping me shower and get spiders off.
   – Karena 32, Lafeyette, CO

Lauri: Going to another planet suggests that you must be feeling like you have been dealing with something that seems unfamiliar and "alien" to you. Has your personal world changed and now seems like foreign territory to you? All the bugs you came back with indicate that this recent "out of sorts" situation has left you with a lot of annoyances. The biting spiders are connected to something that you would say "really bites," or perhaps they are connected to someone's biting remarks about you or to you. The fact that they made a nest in the back of your head means this is something that is really on your mind lately AND it seems to be producing more irritating thoughts, just as the spiders were reproducing. Showering is the way your dreaming mind is telling you that you need to cleanse yourself of these thoughts. It seems you have some metaphoric cleansing to do... for your own peace of mind. 

Karena replies: My son just turned 2 and I am pregnant again.  I do feel in alien territory because he has made a big jump from being an infant to having the typical 2 year old opinions.  I feel that our relationship has been strained and I'm trying to find my way as a parent all of a sudden.  He is also getting really needy for my attention whenever we talk about a new baby coming into our family, which has me a bit worried. And on top of it, my parents and one of my friends are highly critical of the way that I parent.  And they are very vocal about it - I have difficulty voicing my opinions to them especially when I am feeling vulnerable.  Seems like you hit it on the head!

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Dear Lauri,

I dreamt last night that I had a magic door knob and whatever you stuck it to would turn into a door to where ever you wanted to go. One person tried it and opened a door to the parking lot where he was parked. I tried it and had a small square shaped door to an attic.   – Mindy  28, Khamis Mushayt, Saudi Arabia

Lauri: Interesting! It seems you are taking advantage of some opportunities that are "opening up" to you lately. The guy is you, your male assertive self. And the parking lot represents an area of your life that has been on hold and that your male, assertive energy is now ready to get going again. The small door leading to an attic is also very interesting. The attic is where you store the high ideals you have for yourself. Again, this shows that you are ready to open up to this part of yourself and achieve your high hopes.  

Mary Ann replies: After my husband and I both lost our jobs, we nearly lost everything we owned. He had a job opportunity open up here in Saudi Arabia so.... HERE WE ARE! Your description does indeed fit with things that are going on right now. I am feeling a bit "stagnant" so to speak but recently a couple of opportunities have opened up for me as well that I am considering. Thanks Lauri! You are amazing.

Fascinating Sleep Fact:
If you often find yourself so worried about the consequences of not falling asleep (i.e., exhaustion the next day), that you keep yourself awake by obsessing about falling asleep, then you may have Onset Sleep Insomnia. Try redirecting your thoughts to counting sheep or some other stream of thought with little emotional content.

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Dear Lauri,
I keep having a dream that something is trying to possess me. Every time it tries to get inside me, or once it just lay on top of me I can't move or speak. I can just scream in my head to go away or to get off of me. The first time I had to yell in my head "I love God and God loves me" this dream scares me so bad and I have had it three times. The last time was earlier this week. Please help!   - Amber 25, Salt Lake City, UT

Lauri: This is not a dream… nor is it a demonic possession.  It is actually a fascinating physiological experience called Sleep Paralysis, or The Old Hag Syndrome! And there is not a thing one should worry about when it happens.  Here’s the deal, when we sleep and enter the REM state, which is when dreaming takes place, our brain releases a chemical that literally paralyzes our skeletal muscles so that we don’t act out our dreams.  When we’ve had a fitful night of sleep or haven’t slept long enough, we will start to wake up before our brain can re-activate our muscle control, which causes us to get “stuck” in that in between state of sleep and wakefulness, called Hypnogogia.  Cool name, huh?  In this state you are asleep and awake at the same time, which is why you are aware that you are in your room and in your bed.  This is also why you can’t move, speak or scream… because you are still paralyzed!  It is mostly physiological and will subside in a moment or two.  It is not harmful in any way and does not mean there is anything wrong with you.  No need to call your priest!  The cure is to try to simply get more sleep and get negative issues off your mind before bedtime. 

Mary Ann replies: That sounds exactly what is happening to me! I will definitely try to write out my negative thoughts before bed and hope that it helps! Thank you!!

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Dear Lauri,
I dreamed I was in n a bedroom cleaning a pile of dead rats with a shovel!  Parts of the rats were falling onto a comforter on the floor.   - Mary Ann 69, Chicago IL

Lauri: First of all... Eew!! Now, on to your dream. The dead rats represent something in your life that is now over and done with. Most likely it was something that had been gnawing away at you and pestering you quite a bit due to the amount of rats in the dream or it is many pestering issues. This takes place in the bedroom because you are now able to put this issue to rest. I believe the rats are falling apart as you shovel them because - perhaps - the issue this is connected to has fallen apart OR a relationship this is connected to has fallen apart. I think the comforter is there because your dreaming mind wants you to take comfort that this is all over now.

Mary Ann replies: I have been working on a number of past financial decisions I have been regretting and feel I have made progress with a few of them. As you can tell by my age I am nearing retirement and my job was off shored about four years ago - so savings are not what I planned - we had just bought a new place before the bubble burst and places like ours are selling for $50,000 to $75,000 less than we purchased at, if we could sell. My husband worked in nonprofit for years without a pension or retirement savings. No amount of worry helps me now. This makes sense in that I feel the dream is saying they are done with, let them rest. However, without your help I would not have been able to figure that out from the dream.

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"Even a soul submerged in sleep is hard at work and helps make something of the world."  - Heraclitus

Dear Lauri,
I dreamt that my son and I were driving across this huge busy bridge and it collapsed while we were on it. Somehow we made out of the car before it crashed into the water, but we still landed in the water too. We were okay, but really shaken up. – Ashley 25, Stephens Point, WI

Lauri: The bridge represents some sort of transition you are going through in waking life. Just as we cross a bridge to get from one point to another, in what way are you trying to get from point A to point B? The crashing of the bridge suggests you are fearful that this transition may not work out, that something might "fall through" or that your hopes may be dashed. The most important part of the message comes at the end, as is the case with most dreams, in that - despite the crashing bridge - you and your son were okay. This is your dreaming mind's way of telling you, "Fear not. No matter what happens, you will survive this."

Ashley replies: WOW! I will be moving my family across the state in two months and we will be starting a new chapter in our lives and yes, I am fearful about the transition/the unknown! It will be a good move for us because we will be moving closer to family, but it will also mean new jobs, new school for my son, new place to live. Thanks so much for the insight!

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"Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink.   - W. C. Fields

Dear Lauri,
Last night I dreamt I was with my friend and what I thought was her dog. I put the dog down on a sofa but the dog fell off. When it fell off, its paws were somehow all cut off. I thought that we have to scoop up the paws and go to an emergency vet right away.  I wondered how this could have happened.   – Joanne 56, Chicago, IL

Lauri: Dogs in dreams typically represent a relationship in our life, someone we consider to be a friend and loyal companion as that is the typical nature of a dog.  Placing the dog on the sofa suggests that you – or someone s in this relationship - has become a bit lazy, perhaps to the point that the relationship is falling apart, just as the dog fell apart in the dream.  At the end of the dream you feel the need to rush the dog to the emergency vet to fix him. That means that in waking life it is time to decide whether this relationship is worth mending or not.

Joanna replies:  Thank you. Yes I have a friend that has pretty much left our friendship except when she needs people to come to a party. I have tried to stay in contact with my friend but it is a one way street.

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"Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of the week.”   - WILLIAM DEMENT Newsweek, Nov. 30, 1959

Dear Lauri,
I recently had a dream where my son and his fiancée were standing on a small bridge. I was on the ground and they were spitting at me and laughing.    – Cynthia 56, Las Vegas, NV

Lauri: Your son and his fiancée are on a bridge because that represents where they are in their relationship. An engagement is like a bridge between dating and marriage. But they are above you in the dream, which suggests you feel they look down on you in some way or act as if they are superior to you. The spitting is certainly not a good sign. In real life do they disrespect you? We use the term "It was like they spit in my face" when someone does something that insults us in waking life. In what way are you insulted by them?

Cynthia replies: I think she let a lot of things build up to the point she really let loose on me. My son hasn’t insulted me, just the fiancée. He would usually take my side until that night.

Lauri replies: That is why he was standing by her in the dream. And that is what your dreaming mind is trying to show you. He has chosen her to stand by and with in this life. Like her or not, it’s best to keep out of their new life together until invited. I hope this helps.

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"The best thing about dreams is that fleeting moment, when you are between asleep and awake, when you don’t know the difference between reality and fantasy, when for just that one moment you feel with your entire soul that the dream is reality, and it really happened.”   - Oprah

Dear Lauri,
I had a dream my fiancé was taking me to the ocean and on the way we went over a bridge and our boys flew out of the car and so did my fiancé I was stuck while the car filled up and the next thing I knew I was right there flying next to them.    – Sheri 28, Marshall, MI

Lauri: Is there anything going on that you fear is going to pull you away from your fiancé and children? Like a new job or some new responsibility? The bridge is your ability to get through some sort of transition in your life. The rising water suggests you are becoming increasingly overwhelmed and perhaps fearful you're not going to make it through this transition. However, your dream seems to be encouraging you at the end by showing you flying next to your family, as if to say, "Just stick this through and then you'll see that things will really start looking up for you."

Lorie replies: Actually yes. My stress level is through the roof and my boyfriend has been looking for a job or possibly going back to school. But if he went back to school he would have to live in a dorm and not be with us. We are also about to lose our apartment actually and we are trying to find a place to move. With him considering school, I guess I am feeling like I would be left behind in a sense.

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"When dreaming I'm guided through another world, time and time again. At sunrise I fight to stay asleep 'cause I don't want to leave the comfort of this place." - Creed, "Higher"

Dear Lauri,
I dreamed I was trying to walk home with my dogs and my daughter. There were cars parked all over the place and in my way. I couldn't get through. In particular a golf cart type vehicle that was carrying trash just kept showing up in my path. It was very annoying. – Lorie 49, Lansing, MI

Lauri: Trying to get home in a dream means you are trying to get back to normal in some form or fashion in waking life. What has thrown you off your regular routine recently? All the parked cars that are in your way suggest that either there a lot of things in your life on hold, making it difficult for you to get back to normal or there is one thing on hold that is causing several problems. The trash seems to suggest there are useless issues blocking your progress or perhaps you are feeling trashed in some way. Whatever the case, it is something that – like the trash - you need to rid yourself of or you will continue to feel stuck.

Lorie replies: This makes a lot of sense. I lost my driver’s license in 2007 and I've done everything right to get it back but they keep extending the restriction. It's now extended through 2014! For no reason, it seems, except because they can.

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Dear Lauri,
I dreamt that I was pregnant and going into labor but didn't have any labor pains, just tons of pressure in my groin. I then delivered just the baby's leg. I knew I needed to deliver the rest of the baby but was scared to because I was afraid that the baby would be sick. I never did deliver the rest of the baby.  – Candace 31, Lehi, UT

Lauri: The labor in your dream may be connected to something you have been laboring over in real life. Have you been laboring over a decision? Have you been working hard to get a "leg up" on the competition in some way? Or is there something you've been working on that has only partially born fruit? The leg could mean you have only completed the first leg of a journey. Just as you were afraid to deliver the rest of the baby in the dream, what are you afraid to finish in real life for fear that it might not turn out the way you had hoped? Also, the pressure you feel in the groin may be connected to waking life pressure you are giving yourself to complete this project, idea, issue, etc. because the job is not yet done.

Candice replies: I work in sales and had a baby (all intact, thank goodness) 3 months ago. There are many competitors in my work arena, and it is high pressure. I do feel that I am getting better at balancing work and a new baby, but still feel a lot of 'pressure' to do a better job at home and work. I have thought that a career change may be needed, but I just started with this company and love it. I really want to make it work. I have had a few successes since being back, but I do fear I need more to make it happen. You are once again spot on! Thank you for helping me understand where this dream was stemming from!

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